Feisty Female Fears the Lord!
An Excellent Wife is a Leader!
Proverbs 31
In looking at leaders in the Bible there are many to choose from but none that I really saw reflecting my life. I am first and foremost a follower of Christ - and right now Christ has me ministering at “home” with family. I am a wife and mother first. In looking through the bible there are not very many great examples of wives. We could look at Abraham's wife, Sarah, however she convinces her husband to sleep with her hand-maiden to gain the heir that the Lord has promised. We certainly can’t look at Job’s wife who told her husband to curse God. So we will go to the example set forth by King Lemuel that his mother taught him. Is this a real women? Probably not, but it is set up as an ideal for the Jewish nation. In Ruth 3:11 Boaz states; “Now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you whatever you ask, for all my people in the city know that you are a woman of excellence.” Also, Proverbs 12: 4 “An Excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones.” In looking at the wife in Proverbs 31 I saw three arenas of leadership: Family, Fellowman, and Finances. All wives play a role in all three areas.
In family a women often wears many hats, that of wife, mother and housewife. Proverbs 31 labels the three areas in these verses: Wife: Vs. 10-12 “An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.” Mother: Vs. 15 “She rises also while it is still night and gives food to her household and portions to her maidens. Housewife: Vs. 27 “She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.”
In my own life, as a wife, mother and housewife, I do not attain the level of this wife. I know that I don’t rise as early as the Proverbs 31 women, but I provided meals, keep the house and attend to the children’s school work through homeschooling. Also, I am instilling in them the “fear” of the Lord in their daily lives. My husband trusts my advice and listens to me with consideration. Together, we look to the future and like the Proverb 31 women in verse 25; I smile at the future as I know that it is in God’s hands.
Extending a hand to her fellowman the Proverb 31 women in verse 20 states: “She extends her hand to the poor; and stretches out her hands to the needy. If you look back to Deuteronomy 15:11 “For the poor will never cease to be in the land; Therefore I command you saying You shall freely open your hand to your brother to your needy and poor in your land.” The Proverbs 31, women lives out this command.
In our own family, we have decided to go to the “ends of the earth.” As a women and a mother of small children this didn’t come easy to me. I did not want to take my children to this place. But God challenged me by asking me to whom these children really belong. In relinquishing control over my own children - like Abraham did with Isaac on mount Moriah. I realized that I had absolutely no control of the fate of my children no matter where we would live. God told me to feed his sheep, The sheep he wanted to give me. While I do believe my children are a type of sheep for me. God also told Peter to feed his sheep. In looking at who God’s sheep are, I discovered,
Matthew 25: 35-36: “For I was hungry, and you gave me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave me something to drink; I was a stranger and you invited me in; naked and you clothed me: I was sick and you visited me; I was in prison and you came to me.”
I do believe that a women of God, an excellent wife - is one that will go with her husband to the ends of the earth, to extend a hand to the poor and disfranchised.
The Proverb 31 women also treats her fellow man with kindness. In verse 26 we find “She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.”
How does that relates to me in leadership? By going to a “hard country,” a lot will be said about my husband through the way that we interact with the community. I could very easily discredit our witness by my actions as a women. Proverbs 19:14 states: “.. A prudent wife is from the Lord,”
My final area of the Proverbs 31 wife, is in the area of finances. Here a wife can be a helper or a hinderance. A women who is mindful of the family’s wealth can increase a family or it can decrease through unwise spending. The Proverbs 21 women is a landowner, a wine farmer, and a craftsman.
Proverbs 31:16 “She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard.” in 31: 24 “She makes linen garments and sells them and supplies belts to the tradesmen.” She is a women who is confident in making independent transactions which increase the family’s wealth.
In my own life, I have helped with the family finances by staying home with our children, working part-time as an American Sign Language Interpreter, sold children books and currently we are renting our home. I can not say that I feel the freedom to buy or develop property independently of my husband. I also don’t think he would buy land without consulting me.
In conclusion, Proverbs 31:29-31 states: “Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her the product of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.”
This line is important because who is at the gates?
Proverbs 31:23 says, “Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.”
This Proverb must have raised a few eyebrows among the Jewish community. What a challenging Proverb for both men and women. A women can be kept back from realizing her full potential in leadership - limited in her service to God and man. Or doors can be opened up for a Feisty Female Leader.
